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*Mr. Good Bar*
Tossed and turned last night. Probably got 3 hours of sleep if that. As much as I'm super excited to see my bff Katie Mac get married this Saturday, I also can't wait to just relax on Sunday and maybe go to the zoo. My brain & body is on OVERLOAD. EVERY MINUTE of EVERY DAY lately is planned down to the T. My head was spinning last nite thinking about all I have to do in the next two days PLUS work overtime and I'm going crazy. Scary thing is, I got my dress back from alterations and I don't even know if it even fits still from the 10lbs or so I've gained back from all this stress. (EPIC FAIL if it doesn't...)

Well I better start getting ready for yet another ten hour day plus running around to do afterwards.

*Toodle-Loo*

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Current Location: My car, in OC
Current Mood: stressed stressed
Current Music: Preston and Steve

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Wow, its been like 3 months since my last post. Work has been keeping me extremely busy. I'm still working down the shore on that bridge. Mostly ten hour days and Saturdays as well. I've already made over $30,000 in less than 6 months. I will definitely be getting my health insurance back in Nov. because of all the hours I'm working. It's definitely taking its toll on my relationship with Nicole, but were hanging in there. She's going to NY tomorrow afternoon while I'm at work and staying until Saturday. I have Katie coming to watch the dog for me.

At this moment I am getting a new exterior door put in. Its the one that leads to my in-closed porch and it looks wonderful! Kinda expensive but it is all looking worth it. This guy my stepdad's brother used to work with is putting it in. His name is Sergey, kinda cute for a Russian. L>O>L He brought his mason friend Jimmy with him to do the outside of the door jamb. Katie came here today to get her dresser from the back room from when she lived with me from May-Sept and she was like HOTTIES! L>O>L I was cracking up.

Well I'm gonna go play on facebook for a little while before the guys are done and I have to cook dinner and clean. I hope everyone is well in here. I miss updating!!!

*Toodle-Loo*

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Current Location: The couch
Current Mood: anxious anxious
Current Music: NE game

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My mom's having a little Easter get together at her house today. Definitely looking forward to her cooking. Not looking forward to seeing my brother though. The last time I saw him my mom and I sorta bombarded him at his apartment to talk about the bail money that he refused to go downtown for (which has been resolved already, and the money has been payed back to all parties that contributed the night we bailed him out), which ended up in a screaming match and him walking out angry. Yea, def not looking forward to that.Were supposed to pay some Texas Hold Em' tonight too and Nicole is going with me and we have a secret alliance to win the pot. L>O>L I think its going to be like $60 or more.

Last night Shane and David came up from Delaware to visit us. We had conflicting ideas on what movie we wanted to see, Nicole and I suggested Shutter Island while the boys wanted to see Alice in Wonderland. So instead we went to Philly Park or Parx as they call it now. We had a couple drinks and played some slots. I broke even pretty much winning back my bought drink money but Nicole was up $30. Not too bad. I treated everyone to Sonic on the way home. Funniest moment of the night was when I asked Shane how much his dresser was that he had here when he was living at my house and he said it was over $200 because his was full wood. I know, I know, we are all perverts I guess. It's just funny to hear a gay guy say that. We all started cracking up.

Yesterday we also took Dublin to Petsmart to see Kelly and her her groomed. She is such a sweet heart. She didn't charge me a dime and clipped her nails for me, and bathed her with this like anti-shedding stuff, brushed her teeth and made her pretty. L>O>L I gave her a tip though because I know my Dubbers can be hard to handle sometimes. She smells SO GOOD now though and shes so soft, so were going to try and take her like once a month to get that anti-shedding treatment. For a short haired dog she sure sheds a shit ton. L>O>L

So I started a new job. It's in Somers Point, NJ. It's about 73 miles away from my house which is a good hour and 15 minutes or more a day. We are building the 9th St. bridge that connects Somers Point to Ocean City. Its a concrete job. I took a couple pictures and as soon as my most recent ones get sent to my e-mail I am going to upload them to Facebook for whoever follows me on there. My first day on the job I didn't know if I should be excited or scared to death. They not only gave me a bright ass yellow reflector vest that is to be worn at all time on the job site, they gave me a brand new harness with a brights green lanyard as well as a life jacket. Crazy stuff huh? I actually got to work on the barges last week where we had to wear our life jackets all week. We literally have to ride in on a boat to get the where we have to work, but the downside is it's been hot and we have to wear the life jacket at all times. Not to mention that harness and my tool belt that has acquired more weight to it with the new tools that I got for this job. I've already lost 5lbs without even trying. L>O>L Anyways, this job is supposed to last 2-3 years which means I'm probably going to have to get a new car in the next year or so with all the mileage I'm putting on it. Also if this means a steady job for me I am going to really try to finish fixing up my house, pay down on my mortgage and save like crazy. Jersey carpenters get paid like $2 more an hour as well. Plus we have been working 10 hour days when its nice and not raining out (which it did on my birthday and Tuesday as well, so I didn't mind the early quit) and supposedly were going to be working some Saturdays as well. Mostly all of the guys are really nice and easy to work with. The view is amazing and I am very grateful to be working full time right now.

Nicole has been an angel to me, taking care of Dublin for me while I work. It means a lot to me. I'm really hoping that this gives her to extra push for her to live with me. We've been dancing around it for about a year now, me more than her of course, but I'm hoping she decides to stay. We really don't fight when she's here, it's when shes in NY that things can get ugly because of the lack of being able to talk to each other whenever we want and just being around each other. We really miss that too when shes gone. L>O>L

I took my final in school. It went pretty well. I studied my ass off for the written and I know I passed that with flying colors and then I got a 55 out of a possible 60 on the manual which I was VERY happy about because the manual stuff is usually where I'm not so good. We also had our picture day a couple Friday's ago, which was really nice to see all my guys dressed in suits. Ladies you would of been swooning because a lot of them are REALLY nice looking in work clothes, let alone all cleaned up. L>O>L So that means I am officially done school until May 27th, which is graduation at the Hyatt down at Penns Landing. I'm really considering having like a joint graduation party with Carrie at a hall somewhere. Not sure though. I just want to see all my friends and hang out and have a good time. Maybe I'll just do something at my house. What do you guys think?

Anyways, my birthday was really nice. I got money from all the usual relatives. Nicole's mom got me a Home Depot gift card, as well as Shane and David. Nicole got me a ton of stuff, like the Grey's Anatomy season 4 & 5 box sets, these green picture decoration things to hang up on my wall, Japanese Blossom Body scrub & lotion, and some other little things that I can't remember right now. L>O>L My dad and step-mom Lin got me a new vacuum cleaner (THANK GOD!!! The one my mom gave me was from like the 70's or something and it didn't work for nothing!!!)

Well this entry is getting extremely long. I'm going to end it with my trip to Ireland. Since I thought I was going to be laid off for a while my mom and I booked it for the 24th of April and what do you know I get a job. L>O>L But were still going anyway. We leave on April 24th and we get back on May 2nd. I am SUPER EXCITED! I am going to take TONS AND TONS AND TONS of pictures. It's just me and my mom too which should be nice. It's a bus tour around Southern Ireland and we have a lot of destinations which I'm really looking forward too.

I hope all is well with everyone & Happy Easter!

*Toodle-Loo*

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Current Location: My bed
Current Mood: cheerful cheerful
Current Music: The fan blowing...

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I had the strangest dreams this morning. Nicole and I went to bed around 3:30/4:00 our usual since were both not working right now and I had to get up at 8 because Verizon was supposed to come out and fix the phone hook-up to my alarm system. So alarm goes off at 7:55 for me to head downstairs and nap on the couch so I could hear them knocking on the door when they were here. At that time I was dreaming that I was in the car with someone, not sure who, most likely Nicole though but I was being pulled over. And for some reason as I was sitting in my car I remembered that I had Steve's (my step-dad) toolbox in my trunk and that I had gone through it the day before and it had a mini loaded revolver under the one drawer. So what does the cop in my dream have me do next, open my trunk and just as my alarm went off he had the gun in his hand. Whew, did I escape that one. L>O>L

So I'm on the couch now with Dublin trying to fall back to sleep and I start dreaming about me playing with Dublin's face and getting it all scrunched up and then she started making these faces that looked like she was a dog with a funny cat face. I don't know it was weird, but then I woke up again because it sounded like someone was in my back yard trash. Got off the couch no one there.

Back on the couch, my mom calls me, talk to her and then I fall back to sleep a third time. Now I start dreaming of school. In my dream my entire class had to come up with a lesson plan to teach 1st graders about carpentry. My partner John who I sit next to every week (who is hilarious to a tom boy like me) is the first one to teach the class and he has this whole thing written on the chalkboard. All I remember is that he had on the board three ways to answer his question and under those three ways were prizes you would get if you answered them a certain way. So the first way was MOUSE, the second one was HUMAN and the third one was CONDOR. I don't remember what was written under them because the Verizon guy started knocking and I had to get up. But it was funny though because I could totally see John have little kids do stupid things to answer his questions just so he could make fun of them the next week in class. He's one of those funny assholes if you know what I mean.

Ok well I'm awake now and I have to get ready to pick my mom up from her car inspection. My mom wants to go to Liberty Travel to do some research on our possible trip to Ireland sometime this year as my graduation present. Fucking sweet right? I am so excited!

Ok, SHOWER TIME!

*Toodle-Loo*

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Current Location: Dining Room Table
Current Mood: tired tired
Current Music: Silence

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Even though it was like two weeks ago I just wanted to say that Valentines Day was amazing as usual. Nicole always makes special occasions feel like Christmas every time. We woke up that morning and she handed me a bag of presents. This cute little tan conversation heart covered teddy bear, a sweetheart certificate, two heart shaped tea light candle holders with tea lights in them, an shamrock keychain, a Celtic Knot thing to hang in my car, a Going Green T-Shirt, the Blink 182 Greatest Hits album, Weezer's new album Ratitude, the first season of Private Practice and Paris Hilton's Can Can perfume. Lots of stuff.

So my FINAL is Tuesday. I am SUPER nervous. I mean I'm prepared and everything for the written test, but as for the manual I know I'm going to have like an anxiety attack or something like I always do. That's if I even have enough hours to graduate so that I can take the test. We'll see I guess.

Well Nicole and I are gonna try and pull an all nighter playing Lego Indiana Jones. (I guess it's obvious I'm laid off again. L>O>L)

*Toodle-Loo*

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Current Location: Couch
Current Mood: awake awake
Current Music: All Time Low...

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All Time Low "Walls"

Hey there it's good to see you again
It never felt like calling this just friends
I'm happy if your happy with yourself
Take off your shirt your shoes
Those skinny jeans I bought for you
We're diving in there's nothing left to lose

I'm gonna break down these walls (down these walls)
I built myself
I wanna fall so in love (so in love)
With you and no one else
Could never mean half as much to me as you do now
Together we'll move on just don't turn around
Let the walls break down


I used to weigh you like a ball and chain
I'd run and hide at the call of my name
It was obvious you were too much for me
oblivious
I was young and horney
In retrospect I would do it again
Stop talking shit to every one of your friends
I'm not the same boy you knew back then

Cause I could break down these walls (down these walls)
I built around myself
I wanna fall so in love (so in love)
With you and no one else
Could never mean half as much to me as you do now
Together we'll move on just don't turn around
Let the walls break


I can't breathe
My bodys shaking
You've got a way with the way you take me
Cause you break me down
Yeah you know you break me down


I'm gonna break down these walls (down these walls)
I built around myself
I wanna fall so in love (so in love)
With you and no one else
Could never mean half as much to me as you do now
Together we'll move on just don't turn around
Let the walls break down


Let the walls break down
Cause you break me down
Let the walls break down

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Current Location: Dining Room
Current Mood: busy busy
Current Music: All Time Low...

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Nicole just went home about an hour ago. The house feels empty once again, even though Shane & David are upstairs.

I'm watching my DVRed shows now, starting with Survivor. Usually not into this kinda show but Nicole got me into it.

So I went to Rothman Institute today to get my x-rays examined. I got there at like 2:40 which is half hour before the appointment like they asked me to. By the time they took all my information and I payed for the visit it was like 3:30. I think they called me back around 3:40 and I finally saw the doctor around 3:50. I can't believe how bad my insurance is. We don't have co-pays because of the reimbursement plan we have so this visit cost me $285. Crazy!!! So the doc looked at my ankle and said that I need to get an MRI done. But before I get the MRI done he wants me to get an X-ray done of my eyes first so that when I do eventually get the MRI in case there is any metal in my eyes it doesn't blind me. I have worked with metal in the last year so there is a possibility that there could be some in my eye considering I had what I thought was tar blow off the roof and into my eye so who knows. I'm gonna call NE Imaging tomorrow to schedule another xray. YAY!!!

Oh and to take away even MORE money from my bank account I had to take my car into the shop yesterday because of low tires. Here I had nails in both rear tires, I needed an oil change and they had to check my ABS because the light went on on the way to the shop. Basically $90 worth of work. Not as bad as all new tires though.

Well I'm gonna go relax and watch some TV and mope. :(

*Toodle-Loo*

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Current Location: Living Room
Current Mood: cold cold
Current Music: Real World/Road Rules Ruins Finale...

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Nicole is here to visit me!!! She came on Sunday night even though she wasn't feeling well and she is leaving tomorrow. :( We exchanged X-mas presents on Sunday too. I got her the Frappe maker from Target amongst a bunch of other little things for her to open in her stocking. She got me like 2 sets of Bath & Body works scents, two sets of wallflowers and a Target gift card. Oh and she got me a stuffed animal too. L>O>L

So I'm still laid off, which is fine though because I'm going to Arizona next week to see my step brother Ryan graduate from ASU. I just hope I don't miss a major test or get in trouble for missing school next week. On Monday I'm going to my dads to spend the night and then our flight is on Tuesday morning at 7am and we are getting back Saturday night. SUPER EXCITED!!!

Tomorrow I'm finally going to Rothman so they can look at the x-rays of my ankle. Kinda nervous about that. My ankle feels better when I'm not working but then when I am back on my feet for 8 hours a day it kills! I'll keep you guys posted.

Well Nicole is out of the shower, were gonna go shopping and I'm taking her out to Red Lobster for dinner I think, or wherever else she wants to go. I'm gonna go get ready.

*Toodle-Loo*

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Current Location: Living Room
Current Mood: cheerful cheerful
Current Music: The Tyra Show. L>O>L

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So my baked ziti came out awesome once again. Well I can't take all the credit, because Tarah (Shane's sister) gave me the recipe and all. Besides Shane, David and I, my mom, Steve (my step dad), Julie, Melanie, and Jess all came over. My house was pretty packed but it was a good time. I love cooking for a lot of people. I wish I was working full time because I would totally try making different dishes and stuff for people. I also love that I usually make enough to share it with my grandmom. Her and my pop LOVE my cooking. L>O>L

I have a crap ton of stuff on my mind right now but a lot of people read this so I guess I can't vent. Sometimes I really think I need to make a personal journal so I can write whatever I want about anyone I want and not have to worry about what my friends or whoever think of me after they read it. Lately I've had a lot of let downs and a lot of just negative thoughts. Sometimes I really just wish that I was all alone.

I wish I had a JOB!!! I mean I'm glad that I'm getting things done around the house and all, but being laid off and not making as much money that I would be getting if I was working sucks. Not to mention that I'm used to getting paid weekly and with unemployment you wait almost three weeks to get another check.

Anyways, on a good note...Melanie and I went on a puppy play date today for the first time since the end of August. We even brought Charlie with us. It was a good time and I definitely missed Arlo tons!!! He is so HANDSOME!!! I'm not sure how long she is staying for until she goes back to MA but it's still fun to hang out with her again. I still can't get over the fact that I've known her since 2nd grade. I wish Rachel Smith and I hung out more too, we've been friends since 1st grade. The girl was and probably always will be like a little sister to me.

Tomorrow I'm going with David (Shane's boyfriend) to their new apartment to help him with the new furniture that they are getting tomorrow. Shane and David are moving to DE in February. Definitely going to miss those guys, but I kinda wanna see what living alone is going to be like as well. Well we have to be in DE before 9am so I guess I should get to bed soon.

*Toodle-Loo*

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Current Location: Living Room
Current Mood: awake awake
Current Music: The News

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"Love Love Kiss Kiss" Alkaline Trio

Take a look, you see I painted you a picture
It's black and white, except the blood's a little richer
Down in the corner where I gave it my signature
Then I titled it, "This one's for the winter"
Check it out you see it's just a big disaster

I'll dedicate it to the fact that it's so hard for you to dream
A million heartbeats all around you make it hard to sleep
It doesn't help you're freezing in your bed, your blankets aren't enough
All you want is someone there, and all you say is, "So what"

Love love, kiss kiss... blah blah blah
You're making me sick, I wish you'd just stop showing off
For the rest of us that no one wants to love
It's hard enough trying to drink another winter all alone
Love love, kiss kiss... blah blah blah

Well do you find you like to fall in love with people that you're never gonna meet?
It's easier than breaking up and crying in the street
Do you curse the happy couple? Do you cringe at wedding bells?
Do you drink up all the punch while you wish 'em all to hell?

Love love, kiss kiss... blah blah blah
You're making me sick, I wish you'd just stop showing off
For the rest of us that no one wants to love
It's hard enough trying to drink another winter all alone
Love love, kiss kiss... blah blah blah

You can't escape this fatal case of melancholia
It's in your face, in every place you go... it's stalking you
There are days when we all say we feel we just can't go on
But you've felt this way all along

Love love, kiss kiss... blah blah blah
You're making me sick, I wish you'd just stop showing off
For the rest of us that no one wants to love
It's hard enough trying to drink another winter all alone
Love love, kiss kiss... blah blah blah

Oh, love love love, kiss kiss... blah blah blah
You're making me sick, I wish you'd just stop showing off
For the rest of us that no one wants to love
It's hard enough trying to drink another winter all alone
Love love, kiss kiss... blah blah blah

Tags:
Current Location: My Couch
Current Mood: cold cold
Current Music: Pandora.com

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